Outdoor Refresh: NICETOWN Blackout Cabana Curtains — Great on Paper, But Mind the Snags

Alright, let’s talk straight about the NICETOWN 2 Panels Weighted Blackout Cabana Curtains. If you’re daydreaming about a cozy, rain-proof lounge spot for your back patio or want some privacy from nosy neighbors while you’re flipping burgers, these curtains grab your attention quickly. On the surface, they tick all the boxes you’d expect: thick waterproof polyester, dangly weights to keep things from flying, and a look that’s more “lake house relaxation” than “DIY tarp job.” But, and it’s a big but—there are several catches here you’ll want to hear about before you start measuring your porch.

Tailored For Style, Built For… Milder Weather

First glance at the fabric and you can see what the fuss is about: thick triple-weave polyester, meant to keep sun glare and drizzle out. The grommets and back tabs work with rods up to 1.6”, so you shouldn’t be forced into some weird specialty hardware run. There’s even a rope in the box to anchor the bottoms during a windstorm (theoretically).

Sounds solid. The reality? It’s a mixed bag. Wind is where things go sideways—if you’re dealing with classic Seattle breezes or anything heftier, those bottom weights aren’t enough. These curtains have a way of catching a gust and billowing out at you. They don’t end up in the neighbor’s yard, but it’s not exactly the serene, spa-like vibe people expect either. Be ready to get creative with extra weights or bungee cords if you want peace and quiet.

Sun and Rain: Not All It’s Cracked Up to Be

Now, about that “blackout” promise: yes, the curtains make a big difference for shade and give you the privacy to dance (or nap) unnoticed. BUT—this fabric can’t seem to handle sustained sunlight. That pretty Biscotti Beige? It’ll start to look like stale toast after a single Seattle summer. Fading happens way faster than you’d expect. If crisp, attractive curtains are a must for you, be prepared to swap them out regularly or just learn to accept the sun-bleached look.
Rain? Handles a shower just fine. No leaks or weird mildewy smells. Perfect for those drizzly weekends when you just want to keep the grill protected.

Setup and That Pesky Hardware

Hanging these isn’t rocket science—between the grommets up top and the handy tabs at the bottom, you have solid options. But let’s keep it real. Sometimes, what’s in the box doesn’t exactly match what’s on the product description. There’s a history of missing or mismatched grommets and you might find yourself improvising on install day. Bigger sizes can mean longer shipping times, too—annoying if you’re itching to finish your patio before soccer season hits full swing.

Maintenance? You can throw them in the wash and iron on low, but frequent exposure to the mocha rain and wild weather up here means they’ll need some TLC to stay presentable. That’s just how it goes with outdoor gear in the Northwest.

Greener Choices With Some Strings Attached

If you care about the planet, these curtains get a nod for being made mostly from recycled material and manufactured with less-nasty chemicals. Certifications like Global Recycled Standard and OEKO-TEX add legitimacy. But… eco-credentials don’t magically fix color fade or the wind-whip problem. You’re still left dealing with the day-to-day hassle if your spot gets much direct sun or anything stronger than a gentle breeze.

Annoyances and Deal Breakers

No dancing around it—there are annoyances here you shouldn’t ignore:

• The color fades fast. Seriously, count on touchy sun exposure sucking the life out of your “designer look” well before winter arrives.
• Wind turns these from a privacy curtain to a sort of slow-moving parade float. If you’re exposed, plan for DIY fixes.
• Shipping on larger sizes can stretch your patience, and not every panel arrives just as described—sometimes hardware’s missing or mismatched.
• Expect more upkeep than you bargained for if you want them looking sharp.

Bottom Line: Are These For You?

NICETOWN’s curtains look like the perfect, easy answer to backyard privacy and weatherproofing. But, unless your patio gets only the gentlest weather and modest sunlight, there’s a good chance you’ll end up annoyed at quick fading color, chore-like maintenance, or fiddling with extra tie-downs.

If you just want something simple to throw up for a season or two and aren’t bothered by a slightly scruffier look over time, they might fit the bill. If low-maintenance and lasting color matter to you—or you’re in a windswept or sun-blasted corner of Washington—I’d seriously keep shopping. Don’t set your heart on these if you don’t want to fight with them every few weeks.

So grab them if you know what you’re getting into and you’re not afraid of a little hands-on patchwork. Otherwise? Your perfect patio curtain probably isn’t this one.